You know what?  People are always trying to pin things on me.  Like, What I said or did.  That is why I practice the most carefully controlled retention program in the white house.  Have I mentioned how old and haunted that place is?  So haunted.  Meloina is having a field day!  Spending time hunting ghosts in various bedrooms with her ghost hunting partners.  She has like a whole network of them.  Some of them I don’t approve of.  Like that Justin Trombone from our 51^st state.  I think he was governer or something and that Gavel Newsome from our 52^nd state and I think he was a governer or something too.  Why does Melonia know so many tall and handsome goverorers?  Must be some kind of quinceidence and why is it when Barron and Justin stand next to each other its like looking at a mirror or something that reflects things?  You know, one of those things.  With all the banging and moaning going on in those haunted bedrooms during the ghost hunt I am too scared to leave my hydrobaric chamber to see just what is going on. 

So anyway, my perfect retention system.  I don’t have one!  You see the beauty of my concept?  If I don’t keep anything, no one can pin something on me if something bad happens.  So I burn, flush, and just rely on the ole’ noggin for retention!  Noone who talks to me is allowed to write down anything or record it.  I have even directed that Caroline Leaveittobeaver to delay any transcripts of my speaches for so long that they could be scrubbed and cleanedup and noone would remember them clearly.  You know, I remember seeing something about how having retention was really bad.  I wonder what My Struggle has to say about retention?  It’s says a lot!  You see, Heil Hitler was real big on retention.  His government kept all kinds of records.  Who they deported, like all their MS13 members and where and when they deported them.  Wrote all this stuff down and filed it away in case they needed it for some reason.  They were really cleaning up their Country!  Just like I want to clean up the america.  Heil Hitler was really big on deportation, just like me!  Can you believe it?  He loved to deport people all the time.  They never came back either.  Once deported, GONE!  I wish I could do that.  I always get the courts and stuff saying I got to bring these people back to the america.  That is something that Heil Hitler never had to do.  So anyway, they had this like perfect retention system.  German effienciy they called it.  They wrote down everything.  Tracked everything.  It really screwed them over in the end.  When the america won Saving Private Ryan the soldiers like found a treasure trove of records and they used those records to put those efficient Germans in jail.  Just because they were deporting people.  It wasn’t like they were killing them, just relocating them to like other countries like Poland and Israel.  They said they were committing war crimes?  We were persecuting them just like they were common criminals!  Over DEPORTATIONS?!  Can you believe it?  Well, that isn’t going to happen to me.  I am not going to be efficient!  FLUSH BABY FLUSH!  Get the plunger if it backs up Leaveittobeaver! Do I have to do everything around here?