This is an easy one. It would be called The Donald J Trump by Donald J Trump. With the subtitle, How to Win Friends and Influence People who Believe that Chicken Soup is Good for Men that are from Mars and Women from Venus with the Art of the Deal. That is the most perfect title ever. Let me tell you it is already a best seller, and I haven’t even had it ghost written yet. I wonder if I could get the James Patterson to ghost write this for me? That would great! He is like a best selling author or something. I saw a lot of his movies before I decided to cut DEI from the government. Now I can’t watch any movies with black actors in them. I was really looking forward to the next Alan Kriss-Kross movie. Let me tell you, cutting DEI is really hurting me more than it is hurting anyone else. You know how many minorities are in the movies now. My movie nights have been pretty much spoiled.
The most perfect book ever written, better than that bible I keep hearing about
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Things I Thought Up All By Myself 
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