Mark this day on your PDA or whatever you use to keep track of days in months.  It is a sad day for many reasons.  First is that my sweet prince Leon Musk is leaving the special government employee position that I just made up and going back to his beloved holeX, spaceT and teslaX and twittT companies that have pretty much all tanked since he decided to take on my DODGE project that started as a complete joke then somehow became real.  That really cemented the idea in my head that whatever dumb ideas that I can think up I can make happen.  This would be more successful if I didn’t have to worry about that smelly constitution always trying to stop me.  I wish I could just get a hold of that thing and just throw it in the fireplace of the oval office.  Then it would be like gone and not the law anymore.  I am pretty sure that is how things work.  If the original is gone then somehow it never existed in the first place.  I think I saw that like on TimeCop or something.  So Elon was super successful in getting this whole DODGE thing off the ground and we became like BFF’s forever although I think it was time he left.  I saw that he was disappointed in my Bigly Beautifully Billy and I think that we were going to have some friction in the future.  Better now that he leaves me in friendship before my paranoia kicks in and I think that he actually wants to steal my precious.  He is tricksy, precious.  So get the hell out of DODGE Nole!  Well done saving those trillions? Billions? Millions?  Nothing? You know, he might have actually cost the government money after all.  Oh well, that is why I have the BBB to really make up the difference by slashing funding for medicaid and food assistance programs even though somehow it adds several trillions of the dollars to the budget? These things are hard OK.  Bye bye Olen, good luck saving your toy companies and I wish you the best luck in your future philandering.  Thank you for your attention to this matter.

The real reason that today is a sad is that the Trump Burger got a really bad review in some fake newspaper called the Houston Chronicle.  They said the hamburger was bland and tasteless, just like my redecoration of the oval office.  All this food talk gets me really upset lately.  So yesterday or last week or something I had a very successful private and not sponsored by the white house $TRUMP memcoin dinner this was totally a private event not at all linked to paying money to access the power of the presidency.  This event was so successful and I even picked the menu and everything.  It had all the food that I love to eat, that isn’t Mickey-D’s.  It had like steak cooked well done just the way I like it, and something called a halibut which I think is like some kind of white steak, cooked well done.  Tastes okay I guess.  Some of those green things, cooked well done, I don’t eat those.  So there was something for everyone.  Covered in SAUCE two!  Super fancy and served on Trump branded plates, now with 50% less lead.  Anyway, huge effort on my part to pick the perfect menu and now everyone who attended is saying that the food was trash!  Can you believe it!  I CAN’T!  This is gourmet level stuff.  They said that it was Tyler’s Bullshit!  This is an outrage!  Those comments really hurt because that I had all the fanciest food I can think of on 1 plate.  It costed me via the taxpayers like $1000 per plate!  I hired the best talent from my favorite cooking show, the worst cooks in the america to work the kitchen and everything.  I even pardoned that child killer Ariel Robbinson so she could wipe down the plates before they left the kitchen.  You know, I am pretty sure that she was convicted by the weaponized left courts and probably was just whichhunted because she was a MAGA and not that she beat her kid to death after winning that worst cooks show.  It should have been perfect!  I think that everyone who complained about that dinner was a deep state plant.  At least I didn’t serve tacoes, precious.  Thank you for your attention to this matter.